by Jeremy Wheeler ca. 2004
Drifting further than before
I still can feel the burden of Your touch
The pain of leaving you for “better” things
Opens wounds so long ago closed
I know You are there, waiting for me
Hoping for me, praying for me
As You did so many years ago.
I spit in the face of Your angels
Despite the comfort of their wings
Yet they linger there,
Fighting off what you command.
The further I drift, the more You allow.
Not to punish me, but to teach me.
My hardened heart burdens Yours,
But You love me enough to let me choose.
The choice seems rather simple
But bitterness blinds…
emptiness ensues.
I still can feel you here…
Calling me, begging me.
You don’t need me, but You want me.
You want to hold me again
And tell me everything will be alright.
You want to guide me again
And lead me to Your open arms.
And now that I’ve gone this far
I see the error of my ways
So I’m running back to You
And I know You will welcome me
I still have to answer for what I’ve done
You’ll love me anyway.
I’ll have to start from where I left You
But You’ll be patient with me.
You are my Father, my Friend,
My Saviour, Lord, and Confidence.
May I never leave you again.