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Back in the day we used to pass a quaint little church not far from us on our way to our home church at the time. They didn’t seem flashy or over the top nor old school and set in their ways. Occasional advertisements of VBS or a special series let us know they weren’t completely dead. It seemed like it was worth a shot, so i managed to find the website via google. Their web presence matched their physical representation: clean design with updated content, but nothing showy or screaming “we’re the best church ever!” Of all the possibilities, this had the most promise so far.

We arrived at the orange-brick building to an onslaught of “who are you here for?” questions and looks that said “we know you’re a visitor, but that doesn’t surprise us this week, so we’ll smile, but no need to make a big deal about it.” … Ah, yes… The week when family and friends from all over show up to your local church to partake in a ritual found in churches all across the nation: Graduation sunday.

Have I told you yet that there is usually ZERO point in visiting a church on a special service? Father’s Day, Mother’s Day, Easter, Christmas, and Graduation Sunday… What is the point? Thankfully there were only two students graduating and the pastor did his normal thing, so I think we got a good taste of what to expect.

Everything edged on “decent” on our mental checklist, wavering slightly to one side or the other. Worship and the communion on the high side, kids program and preaching on the low side, atmosphere, friendliness, and everything else right in the middle. And lets rename this “Church of the Sons of the Nephilim” … seriously, i’ve never seen so many tall people in my life!

We planned on going back, but excuses kept coming up, then came vacation and father’s day and we found ourselves nearly a month removed from going to any church. The overall “average” impression of the church coupled with general apathy doesn’t preclude another visit to the church in the near future. Which brings us to Church 4, which we visited last week… but that’s for a new post at some point soon…

thanks for listening…

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Category : Church, Empyreal, Family, Sundays

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We had another church picked out with an amazing location… only about 2 blocks from our house! Wouldn’t that be great! So I checked out the website on Saturday night and found a few snippets of the message… I listened to about five minutes of it and it was evident that this was not the place for us…

The next morning, we headed to another church that was close by. We had actually been to the church several times before, but never for a service. For a while, they held concerts showcasing local bands (with the occasional national act) every weekend. We knew a little history of the church and knew the basics of what to expect. I honestly did not think it would be a match for us, but since we had to change our plans last minute it was at least worth a shot.

The people were much more welcoming and even talkative at times! They were not shocked at having visitors and they handled themselves nicely. We did feel a bit under-dressed ( i wear jeans and a casual button-down un-tucked every Sunday), but no one made mention of it. The first thing that we really enjoyed is the pre-service worship. About 5 minutes before service officially started, the worship leader took his spot at his keyboard and just started playing / improvising. It was nice. Slowly the rest of the band made their way to the stage… all 13 of them (4 singers, 2 percussionist, 2 guitars, 1 additional keyboardist, 1 upright bass, 1 electric bass, 1 drummer +leader = 13). It was a strange dynamic/ratio since only about 25 people found there way into the auditorium at the start and maybe 35-40 by the end of worship.

The worship experience exceeded typical Charismatic standards, all it lacked was a prophet with a SHOFAR (see pic). The set went on for a long time and there was plenty of room for “flowing in the Spirit” … i.e. - Extending songs far longer than necessary and improving lots of verses. A few older youth and younger adults congregated on the far side of the auditorium and danced elegantly as to make any born and bred charismatic woman proud… my legs started hurting…

The message was… i have no idea. I don’t remember what it was about. Something in psalms and eagles. But it was very energetic. The music team still hadn’t stopped yet, but at least we were sitting.

There really isn’t much else to say nor much else we needed to see. We saw no signs of the majority of things we are looking for… Family, Community, Missions focus were not evident on first visit; nor was there any inkling of a discipleship / Christian education program. They may very well have had them, but nothing was apparent.

Despite the length of the music portion, we enjoyed being a part of a worship set where at least people seemed interested. But the atmosphere, comfort level, and over-the-top spiritualism is not where we want to be nor where we want to raise our kids. Dionna put it best as soon as we were back at the car: “Just because we know that a place isn’t right for us doesn’t mean I didn’t get anything out of it. I really needed the worship [music] that we got today, but there’s no need for us to come back.”

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Category : Church, Culture, Empyreal, Family, Sundays

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(As i wrote today I couldn’t help but feel it would seem as if I was writing a review or critique of a church, which doesn’t exactly leave a good taste in my mouth. However, I am hoping to invite you along and delve into the same conversations we’d have if you joined us physically at these churches. Please feel free to ask specific questions, clarify, or call me stupid throughout this process.)

For our first church, we decided to check out a nearby Bible Church referred to us by our bro-in-law. He had only visited and shared his testimony during a youth service, but noticed several things he liked about the small, friendly church. Seeing as we had just left a Bible Church and agreed with the theological foundation they are built on, we thought it was a good place to start.

What we didn’t know is that our previous Bible Church is quite different from the majority of Bible Churches, but i’m not sure who found themselves more in shock: us at the heavy traditional style influence? or the congregation at the fact that visitors walked through the door? … Seriously… it was like that. It was impossible for the members to hide their disbelief. Needless to say, it was very uncomfortable being stared at as if we just crawled out of a swamp.

It wasn’t that we stood out in our attire (it was a fairly casual setting), we were just new. After the initial shock, the atmosphere was nice, and though i wouldn’t say it was necessarily “warm,” the opening experience was not a deal breaker.

The kids program for the main hour was non-existent, so the girls stayed with us. They do have a Sunday School program for children, but as a rule we only go to the main service the first time at a church. Tristen managed nicely, but Mac started getting restless about half way through. While they did have a place for younger children Mac’s age to go, Mac wasn’t terribly interested (a theme we’ve repeatedly encountered). Dionna did get a chance to watch the young’ens in action and she was a bit concerned when two of the toddlers made their way into the parking lot without the workers noticing… (yikes!). But hey, stuff happens.

The service as a whole was tough to sort through because a few internal changes influenced the mood. A long time member passed away the previous week, and this particular Sunday was also the last for a leader who was going on to a different ministry. It was nice to see how the pastor and congregation handled the changes.

But there was a lot of good to be had at this small church. They had a wall dedicated to the missionaries they supported… Such a small church providing financial and spiritual support to four different sets of missionaries is awesome! And I recognized the pastor as the guy who I always saw at Chick Fil A on Saturday morning’s where I also meet with some friends of mine, subtly letting me know that discipleship was on the radar and consistency existed at least in his mind. I also really liked the Pastor’s down to earth approach to the message, which was filled with “I don’t knows” … “here’s some alternate views” and a general tone of “lets discover this together.”

It was also encouraging to see the people as a whole treating each other as one big happy family, despite the difficult times they seemed to be facing… But herein also lies one of the most difficult things about this particular church… They were so close knit that it would take a lot of networking, conversations, and nods of approval before we would feel like this was home. Yes, I know everywhere we visit we will feel like outsiders; it’s natural when trying something new, but there is a difference between feeling like outsiders and being treated like outsiders.

At the end of the day, I have no doubt that the people would love us and let us in to the circle, but “Church 1″ fails to manifest the type of outward faith that I want our family to exude.

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Category : Church, Empyreal, Enabling, Family, Sundays

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With the diverse backgrounds and subsequent experiences, you’d think it would be difficult for us to agree on what is important. Thankfully we’re both level headed and see the flaws in our own background as well as the positive aspects.

I know that the Charismatic scene is not something that makes sense to most people and it often confuses emotional experience with foundational relationship (man do i have some stories, though!). She knows that CoC as a whole is restrictive relationally and a breeding ground for quiet judgmentalism. Both of us see how full of vigor cultural-relevant churches are when it comes to production, but how deflated they can become in the areas of discipleship and strong biblical teaching (ouch).

Jonathan rightly states: “choose not because of labels or styles, but be obedient to His call, for He has a local body that will grow you and that you will help grow.” …

And this is what we’ve been open to and hoping for. Ideally, I would love a place that is modern in style and solid in teaching that is also close to our home so “community” is tangible. In such a highly concentrated area as Garland/DFW, a church even 15 shorts minutes away is a completely different community… standard of living, demographics, everything.

So, this is our checklist of sorts… unofficial and fluid. We don’t put specific numerical values to these or whatever, we just kinda take mental notes or jot down thoughts on the provided bulletin. Most of these cannot be evaluated after one visit or one month of visits, but there are always clues inside the building if you have CSI skills like me. In Alpha Order…

Atmosphere - Am I comfortable? Would the average joe off the street be comfortable? This one is tricky because its not just how it looks, but how people act, the goings on from the pulpit and stage, the literature, the kids area, and everything.

Community Oriented - Is the church going to the community or expecting the community to come to them? Are their outreaches effective in sharing the Love of God or simply clever marketing?

Discipleship/Mentorship - Does it exist? is it payed lip service or is there something legit about it? Is there something in place that will enable (haven’t used that word in a while) others to become who God intends us to be? Is there freedom in the general membership to take initiative and enable others for His service?

Family Oriented - Usually tough to tell after one visit. Are the kid-workers responsible and pleasing? What do my children think after service? Can they remember anything? Does the handout/literature lend to the idea that family is important or is the youth/children’s ministry basically ignored? Does the youth section (c’mon every church has one) seem alive and friendly? or bored? From experience, the more youth feel they are a part of the church as a whole, the more lively they are in “big” service (there’s some CSI skills for you)…

Missions Oriented - Similar to discipleship, is it lip service or legit? Can i find any literature on their missions focus or do i have to search high and low? Does the speaker ever even mention anything remotely missions related? Do they financially support any missionaries, home or abroad?

Preaching - Is it style over substance? Is it thought out or thrown together? Does the Spirit change direction so often in one sermon that you’d think He’s got a split personality (okay, thats a charismatic reference for you…)? Does it bring solid truth in a convicting, encouraging, and challenging way, or does relevancy take precedent over growth?

Theological Foundation - This is where it gets difficult and where denominations become an issue. For the most part, I adhere to the now famous “In essentials- unity; in non-essentials - liberty; in all things, love” but the question becomes “what is essential and what is not?” Its a difficult question to answer. While some would argue only that which directly effects your salvation is essential, that which directly effects salvation is greatly debated! Theological foundation is by far the most difficult piece to gauge after a visit or a month simply because there is so much that goes into the discussion.

Worship Music - I love all sorts of music and worship, so its less about style and more about authenticity, which is hard to judge. Does it seem thrown together and haphazard? Is it showy? Does the production aspect overwhelm the spiritual aspect? Is it restricted to music or are alternative worship elements available (communion, etc)?

So I think that pretty much sums it up, but since its fluid sometimes we think of other things. Yeah, it all sounds “duh” obvious, but if we’re honest I think most people find a church that stirs them emotionally and immediately fits their personality, then they make everything else fit into their justification. What doesn’t fit, they write off as a non-essential. And thats alright, it works for some, but not for us. I really want the next church that we call home to become our home for a long time. I’m not into switching churches every few years… Notice I didn’t mention anything about finances, tithes or offerings… i think someone once said something to the effect of “For where your treasure is, there will your heart be also.” The money will show itself (eventually), and thus show me the heart of the church.

I’ve got 4.5 churches to catch you up on, so i’ll start this afternoon and go through Friday, then add churches as we visit more.

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It’s been eleven Sunday’s since we left our last church. The hunt for a new one has been less than satisfactory. Of course, in those eleven weeks, we’ve experienced only 5 churches and skipped a service all together a grand total of seven weeks (7+5=12 weeks, but one of the churches we ‘experienced’ was online, which we quickly eliminated from our list of candidates. It was kinda like Huckaby… nice to think about but never really had a chance anyway ).

So I thought this week I’d briefly catch you up on our progress. I will not mention church names, nor the pastor’s name, but I will let you know the pros and cons for each in order of the places we have visited. But first, today lets look at a little background on our upbringing as this will play a role in our church hunt.

Jeremy: From my earliest memories of church until my 19th year I attended non-denomination charismatic churches. I know saying “charismatic” leads to some very strong stereotypes: Speaking in tongues, odd dancing, random outbursts of people talking in the middle of worship, long services, people falling, pastors blowing, and just flat out weirdness. In a word: “Correct” … Not that I partook in all or agreed with all; in fact, most of it annoyed me. I know from the outside looking in, it seems so out of whack and out of touch with reality. Sometimes… nay… a lot of times it is, but there are a plethora of good solid biblical truths that I learned from being in that environment that I have not seen / heard much of since I left the whole charismatic scene.

Since then, I have been a part of modern, edgy, culturally relevant churches.

Dionna: She grew up Church of Christ and was so until we started dating. Hard Core Traditional CoC. We’re talking no instruments, conservative, letter of the law type of people. In the early part of the movement, the CoC caught a lot of flack for claiming they were the only true Church. Dionna thought that was preposterous until I showed it to her in some literature that was still available to read in one of their classrooms (for the record, the CoC does not hold that view anymore). She was Bible Quiz champion like 5 years in a row or something on a national level, she thought the “Joy Bus” was something every Christian should know about, and her mom was not a fan of me for the sole reason that i was not CoC. But BY FAR the CoC people are the nicest group of Christians I have been around.

Since then Dionna has traveled in the same circles as I have, a few years of charismatic, followed by the culturally-relevant focused churches.

I don’t want to make this entry too long, so I will stop here. Later today or tomorrow I’ll talk about what we’re looking for in a Church, what has brought us to this point, etc.

Until then, i’m curious who else out there is in a completely different environment than their original church upbringing… anybody? (don’t leave me hanging looking like a numskull with zero comments!).

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I know i know, it’s technically not even summer yet (June 21st, i think), but I can’t think that way. I’m 27 years old, but i still see summer as a break of sorts, especially now that I’m back in school. I tend to check out mentally, focus on nothing but entertaining myself or my kids, which is needed from time to time… But i know my history, and even before vacation I could sense that I was slacking… So i need to get back on the proverbial saddle and get to trekking along again… on the docket (in random order as they come to my mind):

1) Exercise: This goes without saying, doesn’t it? i mean… i’m fat… and don’t want to be… One of the things I’ve always wanted in this area is a Heavy Bag/stand… I got it for Birthday/Father’s Day. We set it up the week before we left and I used it a couple of times. Had a lot of fun. If you get a nice rhythm going, using your whole body, it’s a pretty good balanced workout in and of itself… strength and cardio… So i know i’ve never had any good excuses, but really, now i’m out completely.

2) Personal Journaling: Blogging is personal, but there’s far too much insanity to release to the world. Journaling is a good practice, but its tough for me to keep it up.  Even once a week would benefit.

3) Reading: I like to read fiction and non-fiction alike. I have the resources to read both (library, amazon gift cards, etc)… One of each per week is easily doable, one of each every two weeks is more likely… I picked up “Emperor: The Gates of Rome” from the library… five chapters in and i’m not impressed with the writing. I’ll give it one more night before I try something else b/c I dig historical fiction and the Roman era. But, as far as Non-Fiction goes… not sure, going to browse through Amazon.com today to determine what to use my Birthday gift card on. Something that isn’t at the library…

4) Fatherhood and Husbandry: Family Bible times, weekly walks with the girls, meaningful conversations, and quality entertainment (dates, family movie nights, etc.). I can’t ignore my number one responsibility no matter how often the XBox calls my name (yes i have it back… well, they sent me a new one, but its back).

There are others (house work, finding a church), but i think thats a good start… if i pack my docket with too much, i’ll just give up and play soccer on the 360 all the time.

So keep me to it…

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I know i’ve been fairly quiet these past two months. OT Survey has been a workload, and I added more to it voluntarily. I’ve had some time at work to post, but haven’t really wanted to simply due to the mental strain I was already exerting in class… I know it’s a lame excuse, but just throwing it out there…

I do have some plans for some things to write about (namely, our church searching experience), but i’ve got one more night of class (TONIGHT!) so i’m thinking tomorrow or wednesday i’ll start posting stuff worth while again.

In the mean time, lets see just how attentive you are. Just so you know, I did fail the first time, so don’t feel bad if you do.

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There were no flashy presentations or effects, no large band, no inflexible schedule, and no big church mentality. It was simply people who love God getting together to worship their Lord and hearing his pure Word.

I love how the pastor opens up the microphone for ANYONE to come up and give a testimony, praise, or prayer request and then the congregation prays together for that person. It is truly a family environment where the people are there to encourage one another and participate in the service…they don’t go just to hear a sermon or watch a band perform some worship.

Excerpt of my sister and her husband’s experience in a Gypsy church in Mukachevo, Ukraine. Read part one and two to get a feel for the whole evening…

I read through the posts, both of which have a positive message, yet my heart unexpectedly sunk rather than rejoiced. Eh, maybe “bittersweet” is more accurate. I am happy that the Parks’ hearts were blessed and that one of the communities they are hoping to reach out to already has a strong Christian base. There are so many positive things to take out of the story, so why are you so downcast oh my soul?

I know i’m jaded. I know I’m a cynic of today’s American christianity. I know not all of my criticism is merited. I know there are a plethora of churches and a multitude of Christians serving productively and living great examples of Christ… but i read this, and my very first thought was “lets hope American’s don’t screw it up.” … not Lindsey and Josh or the missionaries they have met or worked with thus far… but the big money, big church Americans.

It is a commonly accepted belief (although I am not sure how wide spread) that we have a problem of Americanizing or Westernizing the people-groups we minister to in other countries (Blake posts an intense video of John Piper that addresses a portion of this at least, check it out). The Parks only have to look northeast a few hundred miles to the Ukrainian capital of Kiev and see some of what I’m talking about… Take a look at a little excerpt from Hillsong, Kiev website:

we believe our purpose is to be a mission in Europe, to change perceptions by:

1. Establishing new services in major European cities. The first of them is Moscow.
2. The utilization of media and television to change people’s perception of the Church and Jesus through production of quality TV programs.
3. Expansion of Hillsong Kiev worship music in Russian in order to help existing Russian-speaking churches to become champions in their ministry.

In fairness, Hillsong is Australian based, but closely resembles the mentality of many of our mega-churches as well (i.e.-”westernized”). On the surface, the mission statement as a whole sounds peachy. Ukraine is a hurting society, and Hillsongs:Kiev wants to improve the quality of life. But just examine the key phrases in the three main points they make for a second:

1) Establishing new services… Again, i will make another statement that is hard to quantify but is a widespread thought. I have heard it said by pastors of large mega-churches and small family churches. Services do not make disciples. (see the period?) Relationships, authenticity, and leading by example make disciples. The gospel makes disciples. Services are valuable for various reasons, but if you’re number one goal in “transforming lives” is to create new services, you’re missing the boat. Jesus went to the people, he didn’t ask the people to come to a church service.

2) Utilization of media and tv… changes perception of church… quality tv progams. I am a moderate proponent of quality production in church services and programs, but not at the expense of quality ministry. So again, just like #1, there is nothing wrong with wanting excellence in programming, nor in utilizing the media or tv, but it says a lot about your heart when your #2 priority focuses on the cultural perception of your production. Thats really all it boils down to. Statements like these tell others that the story of Jesus isn’t enough to change lives. The hope of His work on the cross isn’t enough to redeem. The grace and omniscience of God cannot break through the culture the way that our big lights, great musicianship, and top notch video editing can. If you want to change the perception of the church and Jesus, step outside your multi-million dollar building and breath the stench of the prostitute and drug-addict.

3) Expansion of Hillsong Kiev worship music… Do i really even have to address this? Read the whole statement for number 3 again… how utterly pompous and preposterous. Are we to believe that this has anything to do with ministry rather than selling more albums and building a bigger Hillsong Music Empire? To imply (understatement) that their worship music has the power to champion churches to a new level of ministry is sickening! And here we are, three for three, discounting the power of Jesus Christ.

Am I being to harsh? Do i have to give some lame disclaimer that I am aware that Hillsong:Kiev and Hillsong:Worship and Hillsong:Everywhere is an avenue for God? I hope not. I hope you understand that I have enough faith to know that God will still work through the people in these ministries to further His kingdom despite the ostentatiousness of the statements on their site. After all, He has been gracious enough to work through my failures as well. I am not above criticism.

Lord, give Josh, Lindsey, and all those who they work with the strength and faith to see the power that You possess. It is not anything we do, but what You do through us and the redeeming power of Your sacrifice that changes lives. Prepare their hearts to meet those in need at the place of their need and filter Your Truth into the lives of those who need it in the community you have placed Josh and Lindsey.

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Man… proof that sometimes God allows complete dorks to work in His kingdom. Notice the full beard, full uni-brow, and glasses. And by the way, to those who said shaving my head a few weeks back would be great “because i wouldn’t have to style it” … as you can see, i didn’t really worry about styling it when it was longer… thanks to kiesch for being a good sport.

(and yeah, the rendering quality isn’t quite up to par with what we’re capable of now, but you get the point)

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What ministry or project would you take on if you had just barely enough resources? Barely enough money, time, energy, people, support, etc… Its too cliche and easy to ask if you had “unlimited,” but if we set out to do something we really believed in and had passion for, we could probably muster up “just barely enough” to do just about anything ministry related.

My sister and her esposo wanted to start a local food pantry and after speaking with the church leadership, felt confident they could pursue the ministry. They spent quite a bit of time putting everything together, organizing, , vision-casting it, etc., only to hear the church inform them that it didn’t quite fit with the vision of the church for that particular season.

I have had a friend who has a heart for the homeless and we’ve talked numerous times about the lack of opportunity to serve the homeless within the churches he has attended.

I’ve had several ideas lacking only legs that i’ve rarely bothered to pursue because I knew it would be difficult without the church’s blessing.

I have come realize that something isn’t quite sitting right in the relationship between church member and church institution. The realization birthed the following mantra (which you’ve probably heard if you’ve known me long enough, and i’ve know i’ve said it at least once on this blog before):

Church should not be the fulfillment of ministry in your life, rather it should be an extension of your lifestyle of ministry.

We’re all given gifts from God that play out through our strengths within our personality, intelligence, and various abilities, yet in my experience we tend to save these gifts solely for use within the local church. If our church home does not provide us an avenue to serve how we feel lead to serve, we push the urge aside, ignore it, save it for later… We have allowed the church to handcuff us, to tell us when and where we can minister… we’ve allowed the church to dilute our passion… if there isn’t a program to meet the needs of our vision, we simply choose abeyance rather than obedience.

The relationship is out of whack… and it’s not solely (or even mostly) the institutions fault. I don’t want to downplay the importance of the local church. There are a lot of churches doing great things, but there are far too many churches who are just as handcuffed by our inactivity.

But… at the same time… I look at this vision in which ministry is not determined by the availability of a like-minded program that my church offers, rather is propelled by the Love of God within me… the more i chew, the more I see that we have placed too much of an emphasis on the local church, and not enough on the Body doing what it is designed to do.

As a parent, I want to be involved in my girls’ lives, converse with them, watch them grow, help them find their way in Christ… So I chose to be a soccer coach a few seasons back. This allowed me to impart some things in my daughter’s life about working with others, trying hard, accepting failure, and enjoying victory humbly. Coaching soccer did not fulfill my vision as a parent, it was simply an extension of my everyday parenting. How ridiculous would it be if I told my daughter “hon, you get all of me during anything related to soccer… the rest of the time i’m going to do my own thing.”

Isn’t that what many of us tell God? Inadvertantly, subtly, and in the words that are only audible through our actions and lack there of… God stirs our heart and says “i’ve given you the gifts… go do it.” Many of us respond “give me a way to do it at church, and i’ll do it!”…

I’m still trying to figure out how to shake the off the handcuffs that I’ve firmly locked into place on my own. This is grass-roots stuff… it’s not culturally relevant, its not seeker sensitive, and i dunno if its for everyone. But I’m tired…

Tired of words without action. Tired of hearts beating but not breaking. Tired of visions without casting. Tired of knowing what I should do and using the church as an excuse not to do it… We are the Church, so the excuse is no longer valid… And if we somehow get this concept working in our lives, we will see the local church relevant in the way it was intended to be.

(and this more or less is what I presented in my final of Foundations of Leadership)

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