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Back in the day we used to pass a quaint little church not far from us on our way to our home church at the time. They didn’t seem flashy or over the top nor old school and set in their ways. Occasional advertisements of VBS or a special series let us know they weren’t completely dead. It seemed like it was worth a shot, so i managed to find the website via google. Their web presence matched their physical representation: clean design with updated content, but nothing showy or screaming “we’re the best church ever!” Of all the possibilities, this had the most promise so far.

We arrived at the orange-brick building to an onslaught of “who are you here for?” questions and looks that said “we know you’re a visitor, but that doesn’t surprise us this week, so we’ll smile, but no need to make a big deal about it.” … Ah, yes… The week when family and friends from all over show up to your local church to partake in a ritual found in churches all across the nation: Graduation sunday.

Have I told you yet that there is usually ZERO point in visiting a church on a special service? Father’s Day, Mother’s Day, Easter, Christmas, and Graduation Sunday… What is the point? Thankfully there were only two students graduating and the pastor did his normal thing, so I think we got a good taste of what to expect.

Everything edged on “decent” on our mental checklist, wavering slightly to one side or the other. Worship and the communion on the high side, kids program and preaching on the low side, atmosphere, friendliness, and everything else right in the middle. And lets rename this “Church of the Sons of the Nephilim” … seriously, i’ve never seen so many tall people in my life!

We planned on going back, but excuses kept coming up, then came vacation and father’s day and we found ourselves nearly a month removed from going to any church. The overall “average” impression of the church coupled with general apathy doesn’t preclude another visit to the church in the near future. Which brings us to Church 4, which we visited last week… but that’s for a new post at some point soon…

thanks for listening…

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Category : Church, Empyreal, Family, Sundays

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We had another church picked out with an amazing location… only about 2 blocks from our house! Wouldn’t that be great! So I checked out the website on Saturday night and found a few snippets of the message… I listened to about five minutes of it and it was evident that this was not the place for us…

The next morning, we headed to another church that was close by. We had actually been to the church several times before, but never for a service. For a while, they held concerts showcasing local bands (with the occasional national act) every weekend. We knew a little history of the church and knew the basics of what to expect. I honestly did not think it would be a match for us, but since we had to change our plans last minute it was at least worth a shot.

The people were much more welcoming and even talkative at times! They were not shocked at having visitors and they handled themselves nicely. We did feel a bit under-dressed ( i wear jeans and a casual button-down un-tucked every Sunday), but no one made mention of it. The first thing that we really enjoyed is the pre-service worship. About 5 minutes before service officially started, the worship leader took his spot at his keyboard and just started playing / improvising. It was nice. Slowly the rest of the band made their way to the stage… all 13 of them (4 singers, 2 percussionist, 2 guitars, 1 additional keyboardist, 1 upright bass, 1 electric bass, 1 drummer +leader = 13). It was a strange dynamic/ratio since only about 25 people found there way into the auditorium at the start and maybe 35-40 by the end of worship.

The worship experience exceeded typical Charismatic standards, all it lacked was a prophet with a SHOFAR (see pic). The set went on for a long time and there was plenty of room for “flowing in the Spirit” … i.e. - Extending songs far longer than necessary and improving lots of verses. A few older youth and younger adults congregated on the far side of the auditorium and danced elegantly as to make any born and bred charismatic woman proud… my legs started hurting…

The message was… i have no idea. I don’t remember what it was about. Something in psalms and eagles. But it was very energetic. The music team still hadn’t stopped yet, but at least we were sitting.

There really isn’t much else to say nor much else we needed to see. We saw no signs of the majority of things we are looking for… Family, Community, Missions focus were not evident on first visit; nor was there any inkling of a discipleship / Christian education program. They may very well have had them, but nothing was apparent.

Despite the length of the music portion, we enjoyed being a part of a worship set where at least people seemed interested. But the atmosphere, comfort level, and over-the-top spiritualism is not where we want to be nor where we want to raise our kids. Dionna put it best as soon as we were back at the car: “Just because we know that a place isn’t right for us doesn’t mean I didn’t get anything out of it. I really needed the worship [music] that we got today, but there’s no need for us to come back.”

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Category : Church, Culture, Empyreal, Family, Sundays

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(As i wrote today I couldn’t help but feel it would seem as if I was writing a review or critique of a church, which doesn’t exactly leave a good taste in my mouth. However, I am hoping to invite you along and delve into the same conversations we’d have if you joined us physically at these churches. Please feel free to ask specific questions, clarify, or call me stupid throughout this process.)

For our first church, we decided to check out a nearby Bible Church referred to us by our bro-in-law. He had only visited and shared his testimony during a youth service, but noticed several things he liked about the small, friendly church. Seeing as we had just left a Bible Church and agreed with the theological foundation they are built on, we thought it was a good place to start.

What we didn’t know is that our previous Bible Church is quite different from the majority of Bible Churches, but i’m not sure who found themselves more in shock: us at the heavy traditional style influence? or the congregation at the fact that visitors walked through the door? … Seriously… it was like that. It was impossible for the members to hide their disbelief. Needless to say, it was very uncomfortable being stared at as if we just crawled out of a swamp.

It wasn’t that we stood out in our attire (it was a fairly casual setting), we were just new. After the initial shock, the atmosphere was nice, and though i wouldn’t say it was necessarily “warm,” the opening experience was not a deal breaker.

The kids program for the main hour was non-existent, so the girls stayed with us. They do have a Sunday School program for children, but as a rule we only go to the main service the first time at a church. Tristen managed nicely, but Mac started getting restless about half way through. While they did have a place for younger children Mac’s age to go, Mac wasn’t terribly interested (a theme we’ve repeatedly encountered). Dionna did get a chance to watch the young’ens in action and she was a bit concerned when two of the toddlers made their way into the parking lot without the workers noticing… (yikes!). But hey, stuff happens.

The service as a whole was tough to sort through because a few internal changes influenced the mood. A long time member passed away the previous week, and this particular Sunday was also the last for a leader who was going on to a different ministry. It was nice to see how the pastor and congregation handled the changes.

But there was a lot of good to be had at this small church. They had a wall dedicated to the missionaries they supported… Such a small church providing financial and spiritual support to four different sets of missionaries is awesome! And I recognized the pastor as the guy who I always saw at Chick Fil A on Saturday morning’s where I also meet with some friends of mine, subtly letting me know that discipleship was on the radar and consistency existed at least in his mind. I also really liked the Pastor’s down to earth approach to the message, which was filled with “I don’t knows” … “here’s some alternate views” and a general tone of “lets discover this together.”

It was also encouraging to see the people as a whole treating each other as one big happy family, despite the difficult times they seemed to be facing… But herein also lies one of the most difficult things about this particular church… They were so close knit that it would take a lot of networking, conversations, and nods of approval before we would feel like this was home. Yes, I know everywhere we visit we will feel like outsiders; it’s natural when trying something new, but there is a difference between feeling like outsiders and being treated like outsiders.

At the end of the day, I have no doubt that the people would love us and let us in to the circle, but “Church 1″ fails to manifest the type of outward faith that I want our family to exude.

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Category : Church, Empyreal, Enabling, Family, Sundays

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With the diverse backgrounds and subsequent experiences, you’d think it would be difficult for us to agree on what is important. Thankfully we’re both level headed and see the flaws in our own background as well as the positive aspects.

I know that the Charismatic scene is not something that makes sense to most people and it often confuses emotional experience with foundational relationship (man do i have some stories, though!). She knows that CoC as a whole is restrictive relationally and a breeding ground for quiet judgmentalism. Both of us see how full of vigor cultural-relevant churches are when it comes to production, but how deflated they can become in the areas of discipleship and strong biblical teaching (ouch).

Jonathan rightly states: “choose not because of labels or styles, but be obedient to His call, for He has a local body that will grow you and that you will help grow.” …

And this is what we’ve been open to and hoping for. Ideally, I would love a place that is modern in style and solid in teaching that is also close to our home so “community” is tangible. In such a highly concentrated area as Garland/DFW, a church even 15 shorts minutes away is a completely different community… standard of living, demographics, everything.

So, this is our checklist of sorts… unofficial and fluid. We don’t put specific numerical values to these or whatever, we just kinda take mental notes or jot down thoughts on the provided bulletin. Most of these cannot be evaluated after one visit or one month of visits, but there are always clues inside the building if you have CSI skills like me. In Alpha Order…

Atmosphere - Am I comfortable? Would the average joe off the street be comfortable? This one is tricky because its not just how it looks, but how people act, the goings on from the pulpit and stage, the literature, the kids area, and everything.

Community Oriented - Is the church going to the community or expecting the community to come to them? Are their outreaches effective in sharing the Love of God or simply clever marketing?

Discipleship/Mentorship - Does it exist? is it payed lip service or is there something legit about it? Is there something in place that will enable (haven’t used that word in a while) others to become who God intends us to be? Is there freedom in the general membership to take initiative and enable others for His service?

Family Oriented - Usually tough to tell after one visit. Are the kid-workers responsible and pleasing? What do my children think after service? Can they remember anything? Does the handout/literature lend to the idea that family is important or is the youth/children’s ministry basically ignored? Does the youth section (c’mon every church has one) seem alive and friendly? or bored? From experience, the more youth feel they are a part of the church as a whole, the more lively they are in “big” service (there’s some CSI skills for you)…

Missions Oriented - Similar to discipleship, is it lip service or legit? Can i find any literature on their missions focus or do i have to search high and low? Does the speaker ever even mention anything remotely missions related? Do they financially support any missionaries, home or abroad?

Preaching - Is it style over substance? Is it thought out or thrown together? Does the Spirit change direction so often in one sermon that you’d think He’s got a split personality (okay, thats a charismatic reference for you…)? Does it bring solid truth in a convicting, encouraging, and challenging way, or does relevancy take precedent over growth?

Theological Foundation - This is where it gets difficult and where denominations become an issue. For the most part, I adhere to the now famous “In essentials- unity; in non-essentials - liberty; in all things, love” but the question becomes “what is essential and what is not?” Its a difficult question to answer. While some would argue only that which directly effects your salvation is essential, that which directly effects salvation is greatly debated! Theological foundation is by far the most difficult piece to gauge after a visit or a month simply because there is so much that goes into the discussion.

Worship Music - I love all sorts of music and worship, so its less about style and more about authenticity, which is hard to judge. Does it seem thrown together and haphazard? Is it showy? Does the production aspect overwhelm the spiritual aspect? Is it restricted to music or are alternative worship elements available (communion, etc)?

So I think that pretty much sums it up, but since its fluid sometimes we think of other things. Yeah, it all sounds “duh” obvious, but if we’re honest I think most people find a church that stirs them emotionally and immediately fits their personality, then they make everything else fit into their justification. What doesn’t fit, they write off as a non-essential. And thats alright, it works for some, but not for us. I really want the next church that we call home to become our home for a long time. I’m not into switching churches every few years… Notice I didn’t mention anything about finances, tithes or offerings… i think someone once said something to the effect of “For where your treasure is, there will your heart be also.” The money will show itself (eventually), and thus show me the heart of the church.

I’ve got 4.5 churches to catch you up on, so i’ll start this afternoon and go through Friday, then add churches as we visit more.

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Category : Church, Empyreal, Family, Pastoral, Sundays

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It’s been eleven Sunday’s since we left our last church. The hunt for a new one has been less than satisfactory. Of course, in those eleven weeks, we’ve experienced only 5 churches and skipped a service all together a grand total of seven weeks (7+5=12 weeks, but one of the churches we ‘experienced’ was online, which we quickly eliminated from our list of candidates. It was kinda like Huckaby… nice to think about but never really had a chance anyway ).

So I thought this week I’d briefly catch you up on our progress. I will not mention church names, nor the pastor’s name, but I will let you know the pros and cons for each in order of the places we have visited. But first, today lets look at a little background on our upbringing as this will play a role in our church hunt.

Jeremy: From my earliest memories of church until my 19th year I attended non-denomination charismatic churches. I know saying “charismatic” leads to some very strong stereotypes: Speaking in tongues, odd dancing, random outbursts of people talking in the middle of worship, long services, people falling, pastors blowing, and just flat out weirdness. In a word: “Correct” … Not that I partook in all or agreed with all; in fact, most of it annoyed me. I know from the outside looking in, it seems so out of whack and out of touch with reality. Sometimes… nay… a lot of times it is, but there are a plethora of good solid biblical truths that I learned from being in that environment that I have not seen / heard much of since I left the whole charismatic scene.

Since then, I have been a part of modern, edgy, culturally relevant churches.

Dionna: She grew up Church of Christ and was so until we started dating. Hard Core Traditional CoC. We’re talking no instruments, conservative, letter of the law type of people. In the early part of the movement, the CoC caught a lot of flack for claiming they were the only true Church. Dionna thought that was preposterous until I showed it to her in some literature that was still available to read in one of their classrooms (for the record, the CoC does not hold that view anymore). She was Bible Quiz champion like 5 years in a row or something on a national level, she thought the “Joy Bus” was something every Christian should know about, and her mom was not a fan of me for the sole reason that i was not CoC. But BY FAR the CoC people are the nicest group of Christians I have been around.

Since then Dionna has traveled in the same circles as I have, a few years of charismatic, followed by the culturally-relevant focused churches.

I don’t want to make this entry too long, so I will stop here. Later today or tomorrow I’ll talk about what we’re looking for in a Church, what has brought us to this point, etc.

Until then, i’m curious who else out there is in a completely different environment than their original church upbringing… anybody? (don’t leave me hanging looking like a numskull with zero comments!).

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Category : Church, Empyreal, Family

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I know i know, it’s technically not even summer yet (June 21st, i think), but I can’t think that way. I’m 27 years old, but i still see summer as a break of sorts, especially now that I’m back in school. I tend to check out mentally, focus on nothing but entertaining myself or my kids, which is needed from time to time… But i know my history, and even before vacation I could sense that I was slacking… So i need to get back on the proverbial saddle and get to trekking along again… on the docket (in random order as they come to my mind):

1) Exercise: This goes without saying, doesn’t it? i mean… i’m fat… and don’t want to be… One of the things I’ve always wanted in this area is a Heavy Bag/stand… I got it for Birthday/Father’s Day. We set it up the week before we left and I used it a couple of times. Had a lot of fun. If you get a nice rhythm going, using your whole body, it’s a pretty good balanced workout in and of itself… strength and cardio… So i know i’ve never had any good excuses, but really, now i’m out completely.

2) Personal Journaling: Blogging is personal, but there’s far too much insanity to release to the world. Journaling is a good practice, but its tough for me to keep it up.  Even once a week would benefit.

3) Reading: I like to read fiction and non-fiction alike. I have the resources to read both (library, amazon gift cards, etc)… One of each per week is easily doable, one of each every two weeks is more likely… I picked up “Emperor: The Gates of Rome” from the library… five chapters in and i’m not impressed with the writing. I’ll give it one more night before I try something else b/c I dig historical fiction and the Roman era. But, as far as Non-Fiction goes… not sure, going to browse through Amazon.com today to determine what to use my Birthday gift card on. Something that isn’t at the library…

4) Fatherhood and Husbandry: Family Bible times, weekly walks with the girls, meaningful conversations, and quality entertainment (dates, family movie nights, etc.). I can’t ignore my number one responsibility no matter how often the XBox calls my name (yes i have it back… well, they sent me a new one, but its back).

There are others (house work, finding a church), but i think thats a good start… if i pack my docket with too much, i’ll just give up and play soccer on the 360 all the time.

So keep me to it…

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Category : Church, Current Events, Eh... Whatever, Empyreal, Family, Fatness, Friends

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This weekend, the wife and I took in a movie. Due to scheduling, we had to wait until 9:55 PM to see this puppy. The lines, even for the late showing, were overwhelming… starting in the front lobby, curling around all the way to the side exit, and doubling back all the way to the lobby… Listen, i know a few of you guys live in a town of about 3000 and your biggest theater has three screens or something… This theater has 18 screens, most of which are of the largest variety available. These people were absolutely insane, waiting in those kind of lines for a freakin’ comic book movie!

We, on the other hand, are civilized and proper. Waiting in NO lines to enhance our lives and see something worth the price of admission… Expelled: No Intelligence Allowed (okay, really it had nothing to do with how hoity toity we are, we were paying to watch it for school… but still, c’mon now).

Lets get serious for a minute… We rarely go to a movie, unless its at the dollar theater (which has 15 screens), largely due to the price of admission. But with Expelled, it was well worth it if only to show support in the box office numbers.

Most of you probably know a little of what it is about… The tension in the scientific world between neo-Darwinists / Evolutionists and those who support Intelligent Design (henceforth “ID”). Supposedly the story behind this is that Stein (well-known intelligent Jew who supports ID) heard of a scientist working at the Smithsonian losing his position for the slightest positive mention of Stephen C Meyer (Christian ID proponent, author, etc) and a small implication that ID may have some merit. The first thirty minutes of the film follow similar stories (with immense quickness) to show that this is indeed not an isolated event. I’ve gotta be honest with you… it was interesting, but just seemed like more of the same old tired “evolutionists vs creationists” debate only changing the players to “neo-Darwinists vs Intelligent Designists”…  eh… it was neat to see Richard Dawkins interviewed and hear some of the conflicting views, but so far I wasn’t entrenched in the story…

Then IT happened. You know that point in a film, fiction or not, where your head says “wait a minute… this changes EVERYTHING!” But it doesn’t stop with your head… your heart kinda skips a beat and your gut starts twisting in knots…  And you can see it in Stein’s face as well. Up to this point, it looked scripted all the way around, but out of nowhere you, the audience and Stein realize that this has nothing to do with Science and everything to do with world-views. …

Sounds too obvious to be the “IT,” doesn’t it?…

But it changes everything and takes Stein on a completely different gut-wrenching, hand-sweating, disgusting path, climaxing with a head-to-head with Dawkins, world-renowned atheist, hater of all things religious, and maybe one of the most influential people of our time (behind the scenes and through his books)… It may be one of the most beautiful interviews in a documentary I’ve ever seen…

Sure, Stein wants ID to win, but it’s not Stein who says the ridiculous things that Dawkins and other neo-Darwinists say. They shoot themselves in the foot, over and over and over again. Dawkins isn’t even the craziest one of the bunch, he just has the loudest voice in our society…

(i’m leaving a great deal out so as not to play spoiler, but at some point, i’d love to discuss it) …

So, boycott the long lines at Iron Man, and take in Expelled. It’s beyond worth it. When the DVD comes out, buy it… Do everything you can to help Stein tear down the walls… society will be in better shape for it…

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Category : Culture, Current Events, Empyreal, Movies, Reviews

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There were no flashy presentations or effects, no large band, no inflexible schedule, and no big church mentality. It was simply people who love God getting together to worship their Lord and hearing his pure Word.

I love how the pastor opens up the microphone for ANYONE to come up and give a testimony, praise, or prayer request and then the congregation prays together for that person. It is truly a family environment where the people are there to encourage one another and participate in the service…they don’t go just to hear a sermon or watch a band perform some worship.

Excerpt of my sister and her husband’s experience in a Gypsy church in Mukachevo, Ukraine. Read part one and two to get a feel for the whole evening…

I read through the posts, both of which have a positive message, yet my heart unexpectedly sunk rather than rejoiced. Eh, maybe “bittersweet” is more accurate. I am happy that the Parks’ hearts were blessed and that one of the communities they are hoping to reach out to already has a strong Christian base. There are so many positive things to take out of the story, so why are you so downcast oh my soul?

I know i’m jaded. I know I’m a cynic of today’s American christianity. I know not all of my criticism is merited. I know there are a plethora of churches and a multitude of Christians serving productively and living great examples of Christ… but i read this, and my very first thought was “lets hope American’s don’t screw it up.” … not Lindsey and Josh or the missionaries they have met or worked with thus far… but the big money, big church Americans.

It is a commonly accepted belief (although I am not sure how wide spread) that we have a problem of Americanizing or Westernizing the people-groups we minister to in other countries (Blake posts an intense video of John Piper that addresses a portion of this at least, check it out). The Parks only have to look northeast a few hundred miles to the Ukrainian capital of Kiev and see some of what I’m talking about… Take a look at a little excerpt from Hillsong, Kiev website:

we believe our purpose is to be a mission in Europe, to change perceptions by:

1. Establishing new services in major European cities. The first of them is Moscow.
2. The utilization of media and television to change people’s perception of the Church and Jesus through production of quality TV programs.
3. Expansion of Hillsong Kiev worship music in Russian in order to help existing Russian-speaking churches to become champions in their ministry.

In fairness, Hillsong is Australian based, but closely resembles the mentality of many of our mega-churches as well (i.e.-”westernized”). On the surface, the mission statement as a whole sounds peachy. Ukraine is a hurting society, and Hillsongs:Kiev wants to improve the quality of life. But just examine the key phrases in the three main points they make for a second:

1) Establishing new services… Again, i will make another statement that is hard to quantify but is a widespread thought. I have heard it said by pastors of large mega-churches and small family churches. Services do not make disciples. (see the period?) Relationships, authenticity, and leading by example make disciples. The gospel makes disciples. Services are valuable for various reasons, but if you’re number one goal in “transforming lives” is to create new services, you’re missing the boat. Jesus went to the people, he didn’t ask the people to come to a church service.

2) Utilization of media and tv… changes perception of church… quality tv progams. I am a moderate proponent of quality production in church services and programs, but not at the expense of quality ministry. So again, just like #1, there is nothing wrong with wanting excellence in programming, nor in utilizing the media or tv, but it says a lot about your heart when your #2 priority focuses on the cultural perception of your production. Thats really all it boils down to. Statements like these tell others that the story of Jesus isn’t enough to change lives. The hope of His work on the cross isn’t enough to redeem. The grace and omniscience of God cannot break through the culture the way that our big lights, great musicianship, and top notch video editing can. If you want to change the perception of the church and Jesus, step outside your multi-million dollar building and breath the stench of the prostitute and drug-addict.

3) Expansion of Hillsong Kiev worship music… Do i really even have to address this? Read the whole statement for number 3 again… how utterly pompous and preposterous. Are we to believe that this has anything to do with ministry rather than selling more albums and building a bigger Hillsong Music Empire? To imply (understatement) that their worship music has the power to champion churches to a new level of ministry is sickening! And here we are, three for three, discounting the power of Jesus Christ.

Am I being to harsh? Do i have to give some lame disclaimer that I am aware that Hillsong:Kiev and Hillsong:Worship and Hillsong:Everywhere is an avenue for God? I hope not. I hope you understand that I have enough faith to know that God will still work through the people in these ministries to further His kingdom despite the ostentatiousness of the statements on their site. After all, He has been gracious enough to work through my failures as well. I am not above criticism.

Lord, give Josh, Lindsey, and all those who they work with the strength and faith to see the power that You possess. It is not anything we do, but what You do through us and the redeeming power of Your sacrifice that changes lives. Prepare their hearts to meet those in need at the place of their need and filter Your Truth into the lives of those who need it in the community you have placed Josh and Lindsey.

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Category : Church, Culture, Empyreal, Family

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Man… proof that sometimes God allows complete dorks to work in His kingdom. Notice the full beard, full uni-brow, and glasses. And by the way, to those who said shaving my head a few weeks back would be great “because i wouldn’t have to style it” … as you can see, i didn’t really worry about styling it when it was longer… thanks to kiesch for being a good sport.

(and yeah, the rendering quality isn’t quite up to par with what we’re capable of now, but you get the point)

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Category : Church, Eh... Whatever, Empyreal, Video, Youth

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(part one: here)

Church should not be the fulfillment of ministry in your life, rather it should be an extension of your lifestyle of ministry.

If I’m going to “live by” certain maxims, I have to at least mull over what it means for various areas of my life. Its fine and dandy to say something to encourage or challenge others, but if I don’t run with and own it, I’m a hypocrite. If I am adamant in my belief in the value of the statement, I must move beyond pulling it out of my back pocket only when it is convenient to make a point or justify a thought process. There must be some level of commitment or change.

So how should this particular personal-adage manifest in my life?

Church-Leaving: Over the last several months we have watched as our personality and that of our “home” church has slowly drifted in different directions. I think the church we were attending does a good job at several things, but lacks in the areas that are most important to us. We have served faithfully, but we are moving on.

The difficulty in leaving a church lies at the very heart of the fulfillment/extension relationship. If church is only one singular avenue by which I minister, then anything short of heresy or blatant disregard for the foundations of the Christian faith is acceptable. Living so that my life fulfills the ministry He lays on my heart means that I do not wait for the local church to provide an opportunity nor do I need their approval of outpouring of His ministry in my personal life. Obviously the time I spend ministering within the local church is subject to the local church’s guidelines, but anything beyond is governed directly by God, His Word, and those in my life that He uses to keep me in check.

The implications, then, are that I do not have to seek a church that falls completely in line with my personality or style preferences. Using the previous parental analogy, I do not enjoy ballet, but if any of my daughters decide they want to pursue dance as an extra-curricular activity and it turns into a passion of theirs, then it becomes a big part of my life. I may not enjoy the actual experience, but I take joy in their fulfillment. Suddenly, style does not matter. Tradition does not matter. Programs do not matter. Musical tastes do not matter. Demographics do not matter.

So what matters?

Like-mindedness? The vision of every church is based on the Great Commission, or at least, in theory it should be. So like-mindedness isn’t an issue. Execution of the vision? Every church strives to fulfill the vision. Too many go about it the wrong way, but the hearts of leadership are generally in the right place. Besides, if the fulfillment of ministry does not rely on local church leadership, then shortcomings, in-and-of themselves, are not an excuse to leave a church. If we can trace the deficiencies to obvious character flaws, lack of true relationship with Christ, sin-filled lives, and so forth, then yes, they play a role in staying or leaving. But then again leaving over poor-execution means I never gave a damn about the people in the local church in the first place. When a leader falls short, we should be there to help and support him. Not to hide his failure, but to aide in the recovery. Not only his healing, but also in the resolve of other church members. Like-mindedness and execution of the vision, then, cannot be the sole reason for leaving.

We also cannot justify leaving a church based on the opportunities it creates for us to use the gifts God has individually given us. Faithfulness in execution of our gifts must extend beyond the available outlets in our local church. My wife is gifted in helping others learn, specifically as it relates to math. She’s tutored everything from middle school to college and has an unbelievable success rate. I do not know of many local churches who would provide her with a specific “tutoring” ministry, but she would be remiss to allow the lack of opportunity within the church to dictate her usage of the gift.

This shifts everything in my heart. What I used to see as viable reasons for leaving the church, when taken by themselves, are no longer valid. Then again, this is the third church I’ve left since adulthood; the first two were extenuating circumstances so I don’t have a lot of experience in the matter (the first I was asked to leave, the second was a personal sabbatical from ministry that formed much of the internal discussions I’m bringing to light now).

The conundrum created by pursing a lifestyle of ministry that is only extended (rather than fulfilled) via the local church is why we mulled over this decision for several months. But in the end it came down to two very related things: “is it home?” and “are we connected?”

The answer to both, is “no.” We’ve tried to make it feel like home, and we’ve tried to connect, but it hasn’t worked out for us. But how is that answer justifiable as it concerns the fulfillment/extension relationship? … in a word… problematic… at best. Again, that is why it was a several month decision. If we begin to live the way we feel we are intended to live… that is without restrain in the fulfillment of ministry, uncuffed, throwing caution to the wind… it becomes increasingly evident that we must have a home and a church family that supports us in word and helps us find rest for weary legs.

Is it a cop out? maybe on its own merit, just like any of the previously mentioned reasons. But when you combine it all… demographics, execution of vision, dis-connectedness, personalities,  the focus of the ministries available, conflicting areas we respectively hold in high regard… it all points to one thing: it’s time to move on.

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Category : Culture, Empyreal, Enabling, Sundays

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